AARP

Since age is the topic of the hour, I thought I'd mention the AARP magazine. My secretary loaned us her copy. This is a magazine that if I see it in a waiting room, I discreetly look away. After all, it carries stigma, kind of like those newspapers they sell at the local checkout. Everyone knows that succumbing to reading AARP will hasten the appearance of the angel of death.

My suspicions about what they publish in that magazine have only been limited by my imagination. I could just see articles titled, "Ex Airline Pilot drowns in commode," or "Lunatic Nurse Goes on Hypodermic Rampage." Lin was bold and opened it first. She has always been more of a risk taker. I halfway expected to see wrinkles form quickly around her eyes, and her body begin to sag. I was surprised. Her body remained intact, and as she shared some of the content, I realized I have been guilty of stereotyping. It actually had good articles. In fact, there was some of the best writing I have seen in a long time. (I'll blog about one of the authors in a few days.)

They should change the name of the magazine. I suggest "Intelligent Reader," or "Magazine for Brains Not Full of Mush." Lin suggested "Journey's End." I told her that would drive people away. "AARP" seems to be such a bland title. I hope they change the name.

AGING

This month I had a birthday. We had some friends and family over, with lots of food and homemade ice cream. I had a great time. That's good, since it was my birthday.

My father celebrates his 96th next month. I tell him only four more years until he gets a letter from the president. I am assuming, of course that the president will still be doing that. The tradition that began years ago with just a few letters per month is quickly becoming unwieldy. By the time my generation become centurions, the postage will be a budget line item.

Having a birthday has caused me to think a lot about aging. This was the big six-0 for me. I used to think I was old when I turned 40. Now, I don't think I'll be old until I hit 75. Statistically, I hope to have another ten years of relatively good health before I have to physically slow down. Realistically, my health could fail without notice. It feels like a tightrope, with life on one side and death on the other. I don't sense the precariousness, however, because I made peace with God long ago. I'm more interested in the quality of life.

Several years ago my friend Carol recommended a book titled Success to Significance, by Bob Buford. The basic premise of the book is that as we age, our focus should slowly change from providing for our family, to one of ministry to others. It takes on a natural progression, gradually beginning in our early fifties, and continuing into retirement. I like the idea. It appeals to me more than playing shuffleboard for the next twenty years. One must also be realistic, however. I know one couple who is heavily involved in several ministry activities, all in the evening. They save their daytime hours for doctor visits. That doesn't appeal to me. I would rather be hiking during the day.

The increasingly inward focus as one ages is also scary. I know older adults are many times fixated on blood pressure, bowels, and medication. I understand how that happens, and I will fight it tooth and nail. I also know that a person's failing physical health can absorb all their energy. If you come and visit, and I start talking about my ailments, please hit me alongside the head. My dad has never focused on his health. Of course, he doesn't remember anything from one day to the next, so perhaps his failing memory is a blessing. When we go out for coffee in the afternoon, he doesn't remember what he had for lunch. He loves the visits from his sister in Texas, but about three days after she leaves, his memory of the good times dim to almost nothing.

They say we are only as old as we feel. When I'm not exerting myself, I feel 25. The key is to live life without unnecessary exertion. That way, you can live every day thinking you are younger than you really are. You only come up against hard reality when you go help your son and daughter-in-law work in their yard. It's been two weeks, and my back is just now feeling normal again. Next time I'll spend more hours holding the grandchild. There's no downside to that.

THE DRIFTING MOUSE

We have an older Dell laptop that has been giving us fits for the past year. The mouse would spontaneously begin drifting, and if it came in contact with any icons, it would activate them. In addition, adjusting the screen would cause random "static." The only way to bring the screen back was to slap it soundly on the side. I was ready to give it away. Last week Lin tried a Google search. You can find anything on Google. She found a link that described the mouse problem exactly. They claimed it was a hardware issue. All we had to do was insert a piece of clear plastic or cellophane under the touchpad, between the touchpad and a flat strip of metal. It took some courage to start taking the laptop apart, but we had nothing to lose. I found that the clear part of a business envelope that lets the address show through was perfect. At first it was too flimsy, but slipped right in when reinforced with clear scotch tape. It has been over a week, and the mouse hasn't drifted once. The screen malfunction is also gone. I couldn't ask for a nicer birthday present. Thank you, Lin.